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"You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers.
You can tell whether a man is wise by his questions."
- Naguib Mahfouz
I have met many clever people over the years... people who have made a lot of money, people with more letters after their names than are in my name, with fancy titles and impressive resumes. I have met far fewer wise people.
Our society puts a lot of value on cleverness. But having spent a lot of time over the years with many very clever people I've come to learn that cleverness - as measured by IQ scores and bank balances - has very little to do with wisdom and even less to do with genuine happiness.
Living in an age of information overload there's is a lot of pressure on people to accumulate more knowledge; to become more learned, more knowledgeable, more clever! Man, I could spent my entire life just trying to take in all the information that comes at me every day just in my email without ever even opening a book! So with all this access to information, to knowledge and supposed 'cleverness', it's more important than ever to ask ourselves "Knowledge for the sake of what?"
A very wise man called Julio Olalla, and the founder of ontological coaching (with whom I have had the fortune to learn from) once said, "We are too full of answers to questions we have never asked."
What is the point of knowledge unless it is to help us answer profound questions about why we are here on earth, what the meaning of our lives is for and how we can live them with greater purpose, deeper passion, connectedness and fulfillment?
Reframing Our "Problems" Through Questions Rather Than Answers:
Doing the work that I do (not that I think of it as 'work'), I meet a lot of peolpe who feel stuck, frustrated and disatisfied in some way, shape or form. They share their struggle, their confusion, their anger, their resentment, their despair, their problems. They often also share their theory on why they have found themselves in the situation they are in; why their problems came to be. And I must admit, sometimes their theories are very clever and filled with vocabulary that has me scrambling for my dictionary. They often have all the answers except the one to the question "So if I'm so bloody smart how come I have this problem?"
As Albert Einstein once said "Problems cannot be solved at the same level of thinking at which they were created."
Couln't agree more! But the way to get to a higher and more evolved level of thinking is not by having the smartest answers. After all your smartest answers landed you the problems you have. Rather its by asking smarter questions. You see the "Problem" doesn't exist out there; the problem exists in us by the way that we are viewing it.
Our Problems Reside In Us
The broken down car does not have a problem. We have a problem when we are stuck by the road without a way to get to work on time. By seeing that our problems reside in us, it allows us to step back and observe them from a fresh and heightened perspective. You see we are always going to be faced with 'problems'. All the knowledge in the world won't change that. So the way I see it, the only way to address them is to be willing to look at how we are viewing them, to challenge our 'stories' about them and to ask questions that have us looking at them differently.
As Julio Olalla also once said "Mastery of life is not the asbsence of problems. It's mastery of problems." That you have problems is not the problem. The problem arises the moment you think you shouldn't have them. Once again, the problem exists in you.
By having the humility to acknowledge how little you know and the courage to challenge all that you think you already do know (a focus in my book
Find Your Courage!), you open the door to wisdom. So on that note I just want to leave you with with a few questions to ponder. Some may apply perfectly to your "problems" (as you see them) right now. Others less so. But by taking a moment to reflect on these questions it will help you to see your problems from a new level of thinking and hopefully lead you to answers that have you facing your challenges, and living your life, with greater wisdom. If you would like to print a one page handout out of these questions (plus over a dozen more) to refer to as new 'problems' come along just click on this link.
* Is there a pattern to this 'problem'? How has my way of dealing with this problem perpetuated this pattern?
* What conversation do I know I need to have that I'm putting off? Why? At what cost?
* Am I trying to force an outcome? Why am I meeting such resistance? What do I need to let go of? * What is the deeper learning for me to gain from this problem/challenge?
* Who do I need to be to rise to the challenge that lies before me?
* What emotions am I failing to acknowledge fully? How is this undermining my ability to address the situation effectively?
* Am I genuinely happy? If not, why not? What unfulfilled needs are undermining my contentedness?
* What assumptions I am making about a person or problem that may simply be invalid?
* Am I pretending something is okay that I intuitively know isn't?
* Where am I letting other peoples' opinions determine my choices and run my life? Why do I care so much about what they think?
* Does my future inspire me? If not, what future would?
* When I look back on my life, what might I regret more than anything else not having tried to do?
Remember, its okay not to have all the answers. What matters most is your willingness to sit with the questions. Who knows the wisdom that you might stumble upon along the way.
Until next month...
Think Bigger, Live Bolder, Shine Brighter!
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Speaking |
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Margie runs interactive workshops and programs focused on helping people live, lead and communicate with greater clarity, confidence and courage.
If you would like a copy of her new 8 page brochure with details about her speaking programs, client testimonials etc please email your mailing address to speaking@margiewarrell.com
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Wondering where you could be living with more courage?
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Without courage, wisdom bears no fruit.
Baltasar Gracian
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"Computers are useless. They can only give you answers."
Pablo Picasso
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Knowledge is a process of piling up facts; wisdom lies in their simplification.
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"Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear."
Thomas Jefferson
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One who asks a question is a fool for five minutes; one who does not ask a question remains a fool forever."
Chinese Proverb
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The surest sign of an unenlightened person is his claim to having found it.
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"Believe those who are seeking the truth.
Doubt those who find it.
Andre Gidde
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The greatest deed we can do for another is not to share our riches, but to reveal to another their own.
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